I was so nervous the whole week leading up to graduation. I couldn't decide what to wear or what song to dance to.
On Wednesday Marc started randomly sending me songs he thought I might like, so I asked him for dance suggestions. He suggested a few things that were alright, I just wasn't feelin it.
Sunday I went to practice and made a play list of some contenders (which may or may not have included Justin Bieber). I was afraid I would forget the dance because I get really nervous when I know everyone is watching. This wouldn't be bad if I could improvise, but I'm just not good at that yet.
Anyway, I went through the routine, whatever. The other thing I was concerned about was the ending. After our last spin we end up on the ground and have to push forward on our knees (kind of slide) to get away from the pole. I can't push forward to save my life. My skin just grips the floor. Ouch.Graduation day. I had settled on my song "Too Close" By Alex Claire* (a Marc suggestion), my outfit, and was ready to get it over with. I felt so nervous I started to feel sick. The last time my nerves were this intense was before my first one on one date with Marc (I think my hands were even shaking in the taxi on my way over…why am I so awkward?).
*Can I just take a time out to say that this all happened before they started using that song in the Microsoft commercial? I'm just sayin.
The nerves only intensified once I went home and got changed. B wanted me to practice for her, so I did, even though there was a lot of marking since we don't have a pole. She said I would do great and that helped to calm me down for like 5 sec. I headed early to class to get in some practice. A few of the other girls couldn't remember the dance, so I would show them and tell them what's next. That really helped me a lot because I realized that I do know what's up. As soon as Erica walked in I volunteered to go first. "I VOLUNTEER! I volunteer as tribute for pole class." <-- that's what I should have said, but I was too nervous to think to use it. Dang. Before I performed I stopped by the bathroom to wipe the sweat off of my hands and legs. Then it was show time!
When she announced me I totally did cheer hands. Yep, I was obviously ready to bring the sexy. Haha. I just kept telling myself to breathe slow and to take my time. I made it through the performance and would grade it an A. YAY ME! There's always room for improvement (I'm not going to pick my performance apart, just in case you ever watch it you probably won't notice the things that I did). After it was done I was shaking from the adrenaline. Awkward.
Cierra volunteered to go next, but after she was done no one wanted to step up…so you know I had to say something…"I guess we just set the bar so high that no one else wants to go." I was kidding but I did get the stink eye from one girl. Haha. But honestly, that's why I volunteered to go first. I wanted to be the one to set the bar. I knew that if someone went before me and did really well it would just freak me out even more.
After everyone danced it was time for graduation and Erica to hand out our
I went home as fast as I could, ran through the parking garage, and basically knocked down the apt door with excitement. B was waiting for my return so we could check out the video (yes, we got to record our performances). I was so excited (but kinda nervous) to see it. Luckily B was impressed! She mentioned that when I would always come home beat up and bruised she basically thought it must be because I sucked…well, my friends, that is def not the case!
Sorry, but I don't think I'm going to post this video to the blog…I just don't really like the idea of my grandma/little brother/dad (if he remembers I have this blog) watching it.
But if you see me in real life, ask and I will totes share!
Major bummer, I really want to see the video!!! I bet you did do a great job. Miss you bunches. Not sure when we are going to make it back to Houston. I love you.
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GrandMa doesn't shock as easily as she use to, put poor Papa I don't think he could handle it. He still thinks of you as the little girl he made chocolate milk for after school. Let's leave it like that, he is happier that way. We love you and miss you. Grand Ma
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